ARE YOU CONSIDERING
A DIVORCE?
As we enter Springtime, many people's mindset begins to think about renewal and fresh starts. For those in miserable relationships, divorce might be the first step toward your new beginning. However, ending a marriage is life-changing and requires some serious soul-searching.
We encourage people to find counseling and try everything they can to stay together and persevere. In many cases, those actions often come too late, and relationships become unrepairable.
It doesn't mean your relationship is over if you start considering divorce. This may be the first sign that you really need professional help. It may also be because you’ve reached your limit and need out; only you can gauge where on that spectrum you are.
Nonetheless, preparation is an important first step in anything we do, and divorce is no different. You should find value in the following article if you're considering divorce. At the very least, this article will have you pointed in the right direction and thinking about the right things.
TIPS ABOUT ASSETS
IN DIVORCE
Divorce is a tough decision and becomes even more challenging when assets are involved. Protecting your assets should be a top priority if you're considering divorce. While you want to be fair, you also want to be prepared in case your spouse decides to be unreasonable.
Tip 1: Understanding Shared Assets
When you and your spouse share assets, you both have a legal claim to them. These include your home, cars, bank accounts, investments, and even retirement accounts. Understanding which assets are shared and separate is the first step in preparing for a potential divorce.
Tip 2: The Division of Assets
The division of assets during a divorce can be a complicated process. Each state has its own laws regarding asset division, but there are some general principles to keep in mind:
1. Equitable Distribution: Most states follow the equitable distribution principle, meaning that assets are divided fairly but not necessarily equally.
2. Community Property: In some states, all assets acquired during the marriage are considered community property and are divided equally between spouses.
3. Separate Property: Assets owned before the marriage or acquired by one spouse through inheritance, or a gift are typically considered separate property and are not subject to division.
Tip 3: Negotiating Asset Division
Negotiation is often the key to reaching a fair and satisfactory outcome when dividing assets. Here are some tips for successful negotiation:
1. Be Prepared: Understand the value of your assets and be ready to discuss your preferred division with your spouse.
2. Keep Emotions In Check: Divorce can be an emotionally charged process, but it’s essential to stay focused on your goals and avoid letting emotions dictate your decisions.
3. Be Flexible: Be willing to compromise and find creative solutions to reach a fair agreement.
4. Seek Professional Help: If you reach an agreement on your own, consider working with a mediator or attorney to help negotiate the division of assets.
“Consider what is really worth fighting for. It’s easy to put a numerical value on specific assets like a home or 401(k), but much harder with furniture or yard equipment with a few years of use. Deciding who gets these things is a part of the negotiation process. If the other party is stubborn about who gets what, reflect on what is important to you. Something with a high monetary or sentimental value might be worth a court battle. However, you might want to spend the attorney’s fees on something other than valueless items.”
– Clare Mattione, Associate Attorney
Tip 4: Protecting Your Assets
Protecting your assets is a critical aspect of considering divorce. Here are some steps you can take to ensure that your assets are safeguarded during this challenging time:
1. Gather Documentation: Collect and organize all financial records, including bank statements, tax returns, and investment account information. This will help you understand the full scope of your shared assets.
2. Consult A Financial Advisor: A financial advisor can help you navigate the complex process of separating your assets and developing a plan for your financial future.
3. Avoid Major Financial Decisions: Avoid making significant financial decisions during the divorce process, such as selling or buying property, making substantial investments, or gifting assets.
TIPS ABOUT FINANCES
IN DIVORCE?
If you're considering divorce, it's natural to feel overwhelmed by the many aspects involved, including the financial implications. Protecting your finances and understanding how they will be divided is a crucial step in the process.
Tip 5: Understanding Your Financial Picture
Before delving into the specifics of dividing finances, it’s essential to have a clear understanding of your financial situation. Gather all necessary documentation, such as bank statements, investment accounts, and tax returns, to get a complete picture of your assets and liabilities. This information will be crucial when negotiating with your spouse or consulting a divorce attorney.
Tip 6: Separate vs. Marital Property
One crucial aspect of considering divorce is determining which assets are considered separate and which are marital property. Separate property typically includes assets acquired before the marriage, inheritances, and gifts received solely by one spouse. Marital property, on the other hand, consists of assets accumulated during the marriage. Understanding this distinction is key to protecting your finances in a divorce.
Tip 7: Dividing Marital Property
Dividing marital property can be complicated, but there are two primary methods: community property and equitable distribution. In community property states, marital assets are typically split equally between spouses. In equitable distribution states, assets are divided fairly, but not necessarily equally, based on various factors such as the length of the marriage, each spouse’s financial contributions, and their earning potential. It’s essential to research the laws in your state to understand how your finances will be affected or talk to an attorney.
“Divorce is hard enough on its own. Try not to think of your possible ex as your enemy. If you can be cordial with each other, you will have a better chance to avoid the terrible divorce.”
– Craig Valentine, Managing Partner
Tip 8: Alimony & Child Support
Another critical consideration when contemplating divorce is the potential for alimony or child support payments. Alimony is financial support paid by one spouse after a divorce. In contrast, child support is a payment made by one parent to the other for the care and well-being of their children. The amount and duration of these payments will depend on your individual circumstances, so it’s essential to consult with a lawyer or financial advisor to understand your obligations.
Tip 9: Protecting Your Credit
Divorce can significantly impact your credit score, so it’s vital to take steps to protect it during the process. Establish credit in your name and monitor your credit report to ensure no unauthorized activity occurs. Maintaining a good credit score will help you secure loans or credit cards in the future.
Tip 10: Seek Professional Guidance
It’s advisable to consult with financial professionals, such as a divorce attorney, financial planner, or accountant, to help you navigate the complex financial aspects of divorce. They can provide valuable advice and support, ensuring you make informed decisions that protect your financial future.
TIPS ABOUT CHILDREN
IN A DIVORCE
When considering divorce, it's important to consider the needs and well-being of any children involved. Divorce can have a significant emotional impact on children, and understanding how to navigate the process compassionately can help to minimize potential negative effects.
Tip 11: Open Communication
Open and honest communication is essential in general, but especially when considering children in divorce. Be prepared to provide age-appropriate explanations and discuss the situation in a way that they can understand. Reassuring children they are loved, and that the decision is not their fault will help alleviate guilt and confusion. Find opportunities to have alone time and share feelings with each other.
Tip 12: Minimizing Conflict
As you know, shielding children from parental arguments and conflict is vital. However, as you start to get more serious about divorce, be focused on keeping disagreements and discussions about the divorce away from them as much as possible. Focusing on co-parenting and collaboration can help create a more positive environment for children, making it easier for them to adjust to the changes. Have a suggested plan to offer once you’ve started the divorce process. Don’t leave big decisions until the day you break the news about divorce–be prepared to minimize conflict.
Tip 13: Establish A Support System
A strong support system is crucial for children during a divorce. Consider ways to encourage children to talk to trusted friends, family members, or even professionals, such as therapists or counselors. Building a support network be a divorce can help them feel more secure and better equipped to cope with the emotional challenges coming. If there is a lot of conflict in the relationship, you should seek a professional prior and be prepared.
“Start thinking about a long-term parenting plan and the possibility of a temporary one if you and your ex cannot agree on a custody schedule before permanent orders are issued in your case.”
– Sarah Wilkonson, Associate Attorney
“Pursuing orders where the other parent has restricted access to the child(ren) can become a wildly expensive pursuit where such restriction is not warranted. In circumstances where a limitation of a parent’s access to the child(ren) is justified, there is nothing more important.”
– Nicholas Tootalian, Managing Partner
“I would encourage parents to enroll their child in therapy as soon as one of the parties’ files for divorce. The child will be experiencing unavoidable disruptions and changes to their routine, schedule, living situation, and possibly even school. So, enrolling the child in counseling in the early stages of divorce can be that one source of structure and stability they seek and need. Additionally, this will help teach them coping and communication skills. Being able to cope with any emotional trauma they may be experiencing, rather than navigating the situation themselves, is best. Don’t wait for emotional trauma to occur before finding help–get help first.”
– Jackie Collins, Associate Attorney
Tip 14: Prioritizing Stability & Consistency
A stable home environment with regular routines and schedules will help children feel more secure during divorce, just as before. If you conclude that the children will lose their daily stability, ask yourself when this might change. If tolerable, you can persevere until it is a better time for the child(ren). If you cannot offer stability, at least offer consistency. Consistency is especially important if life must change after the start of the divorce. Consistency can help children adjust to changes more easily.
TIPS ABOUT PETS
IN A DIVORCE
Divorce can be a challenging time for everyone involved, including your pets. If you are considering divorce, it is important to consider how your decision will affect your beloved animals.
Tip 15: Emotional Impact
Just like humans, pets can sense tension and stress in their environment. When considering divorce, it is essential to remember that your pets may also be affected emotionally. Make an effort to provide extra love and attention to your pets during this time to help them feel secure.
Tip 16: Legal Considerations
In many states, pets are considered property in divorce proceedings. However, some states have started recognizing pets’ unique role in our lives and considering their best interests during divorce cases. Researching the laws in your area and consulting with a legal professional to understand how to best protect your pets is important.
Tip 17: Who Gets Custody?
When dividing pets, it can be difficult to determine who should have custody. Here are some factors to consider:
1. Primary Caregiver: Who has been the primary caregiver for the pet? This person might be more suited to continue caring for the pet after the divorce.
2. Living Situation: Consider the living arrangements for both parties. Who has a more pet-friendly environment? The pet must be placed in a safe and comfortable home.
3. Children’s Attachment: If children are involved, it is crucial to consider their emotional attachment to the pet. Sometimes, the pet may be better off staying with the children for their emotional well-being.
“While we understand the emotional attachment people share with their beloved pets, Colorado courts do not view pets the same way as children. Colorado courts consider pets as “property.” They are uninclined to order shared or joint custody arrangements regarding people’s adored pets. Thus, if the parties are considering implementing a shared or joint custody arrangement, they should have an agreement before going in front of a judge.”
– Chelsea Hillman, Senior Attorney
Tip 18: Co-Parenting Your Pets
If both parties are committed to the welfare of their pets, co-parenting may be an option. This arrangement involves both parties sharing custody and responsibilities for the pet. Consider a schedule that works for you and your pet, keeping their routine consistent.
Tip 19: Rehoming Pets
In some cases, it may be in the pet’s best interest to be rehomed. This can be a heart-wrenching decision, but it is important to prioritize the pet’s well-being. If you rehome your pet, find a loving and stable home for them.
TIPS ABOUT SOCIAL MEDIA USE
IN A DIVORCE
In today's digital age, social media plays a major role in our lives, and it's essential to know how to handle it when considering divorce. Depending on how you use these platforms there may be some considerations you need to make.
Tip 20: Adjust Those Privacy Settings
One of the first things you should do is adjust your privacy settings on the social media platforms you use most. Limit who can see your posts and monitor comments on your profile to protect your privacy.
Tip 21: Change For Your Well-Being
It’s crucial to avoid oversharing personal details about your relationship–good or bad. Sharing too much can make the situation even more emotionally challenging. Hateful comments, unexpected direct messages, and more can ruin an afternoon quickly. You may consider taking a social media break to protect yourself until you’re in a better place.
Tip 22: Watch For Your Legal Interests
Again, sharing information about your relationship or thoughts of divorce on social media can be evidence against you in court in the future. This can impact child custody arrangements, financial agreements, and more. Protecting your legal interests is important and you should be cautious about what you post regardless of how you feel.
“Don’t delete social posts! Depending on the state and county, there may be laws against deleting social media posts after a divorce suit is started to preserve evidence. You may actually get into legal trouble for deleting a post you regret. Since you can’t delete, also consider not posting. Social media posts also often play a huge evidentiary role in child custody disputes. Trashing the other parent on social media is not going to look good in the eyes of any judge – especially if children are old enough to be on social media themselves and see these posts. Posting about your own behavior may come back to bite you as well. It is ultimately best to refrain from posting until things are settled.”
– Clare Mattione, Associate Attorney
TIPS ABOUT TAXES
IN DIVORCE
If you're considering divorce, you're not alone. It's a difficult decision that affects every aspect of your life, including taxes. While divorce is emotionally charged, understanding the tax implications is crucial for a smoother transition. This compassionate guide will help you navigate the tax concerns related to divorce.
Tip 23: Filing Status & Tax Breaks
When you’re married, you can file your taxes jointly or separately. However, you’ll need to file as a single person or head of household after a divorce. This change in filing status may lead to different tax brackets and rates. Be sure to understand the tax implications of each filing status to make the best decision for your financial situation.
Tip 24: Alimony & Child Support
Alimony and child support are common financial concerns when considering divorce. Alimony is typically taxable to the recipient and deductible for the payer, while child support is neither taxable nor deductible. Knowing the difference and having clear agreements in your divorce settlement are essential to minimize tax burdens.
Tip 25: Division Of Assets
During a divorce, assets like real estate, investments, and retirement accounts are often divided. It’s important to consider the tax implications of these divisions. For example, selling a jointly owned home may result in capital gains tax, while dividing a retirement account may require a Qualified Domestic Relations Order (QDRO) to avoid early withdrawal penalties and taxes.
“Nurturing yourself and being mindful of your well-being during any transition is crucial. Make time to focus on mental health, physical health, and overall wellness. Your choices may include professional help, personal reflection, or designating a trusted person who will respect your boundaries and privacy. Self-care will bolster your ability to be fully present for your children. It is the foundation for wise and clear decisions.“
– Colin Galloway, Associate Attorney
Tip 26: Dependency Exemptions & Tax Credits
Claiming children as dependents can provide tax benefits like exemptions and credits. However, only one parent can claim the child as a dependent after a divorce. Typically, the custodial parent claims the child, but this can be negotiated in the divorce agreement. Understanding the tax benefits of claiming dependents will help you make informed decisions during divorce.
Tip 27: Tax Planning & Professional Help
Divorce can be complicated, and tax planning is an essential part of the process. To ensure you’re making the best decisions for your financial future, it’s wise to consult with a tax professional or financial advisor. These experts can help you navigate the tax implications of divorce and create a plan tailored to your needs.
TIPS ABOUT MENTAL HEALTH
IN A DIVORCE
Navigating the emotional challenges of divorce can be overwhelming, but with these essential mental health tips, you can find strength and healing during this difficult transition.
Tip 28: Seek Professional Help & Support
Engage the assistance of mental health professionals and consider joining a divorce support group to receive guidance, coping strategies, and comfort in a shared experience. Discovering a local support group is simpler than you might think. Here are some effective methods to initiate your search:
1. Religious Organizations: Reach out to your local religious organizations and inquire about divorce support groups in the area.
2. Lawyers: Consult your attorney handling your case for recommendations on suitable support groups.
3. Physicians: Seek guidance from your physician or therapist, who can provide valuable tips on finding the most fitting group for your needs.
4. Psychology Today: Explore the Psychology Today website, where you can find comprehensive listings of support groups available.
Tip 29: Practice Self-Care
Prioritize activities that promote relaxation and well-being, including engaging in regular exercise routines, pursuing hobbies that bring you joy, ensuring you get enough restful sleep, nourishing your body with healthy and wholesome foods, and making time to enjoy the rejuvenating benefits of spending time outdoors in nature.
Tip 30: Embrace Mindfulness & Meditation
Cultivate mindfulness to wholeheartedly accept and embrace the present moment without judgment, allowing yourself to be fully aware of your thoughts and emotions, and use meditation as a powerful tool to not only reduce stress and anxiety but also to enhance concentration, foster emotional resilience, and deepen your self-awareness for a more profound sense of inner peace and clarity.
“Understand that experiencing a range of emotions is completely normal. It’s okay to feel sad, angry, exhausted, frustrated, or confused, and these feelings may be intense. Additionally, you might experience anxiety about the future. However, it’s important to acknowledge that with time, these reactions will gradually subside. Even when leaving an unhealthy marriage, stepping into the unknown can be daunting.”
– Mental Health America
Tip 31: Stay Active Physically & Emotionally
Engage in a diverse range of regular physical activities, such as walking, jogging, yoga, or dancing, to release endorphins and elevate your mood, while also dedicating time to actively acknowledge and process your emotions through journaling, therapy, or heartfelt conversations with trusted friends, facilitating a balanced and holistic approach to nurturing both your body and mind during this challenging period.
Tip 32: Focus On The Future & Seek Social Support
Take proactive steps towards setting new personal and professional goals, envisioning a fulfilling life beyond the divorce, while also creating daily routines that foster a sense of stability and normalcy, and in times of emotional turmoil, remember to lean on the unwavering support of compassionate loved ones who can provide a strong and understanding network to help you navigate through the ups and downs of the divorce journey.
CONCLUSION
Hopefully, this article has been able to provide some insight into the decision of divorce and the considerations you should be having. Preparation is vital to making sure you get the outcome you seek for your family and finances. Think about every aspect of your life and how divorce will change it, even simple household chores.
Our team of experienced family law attorneys takes a compassionate approach to the practice of family law. Using innovative technology to create an effective and efficient process for our clientele, our attorneys approach each case as a collective effort to find the best long-term solutions for each family. We currently practice in Colorado, California, and Texas.
Click the following link to view all of our family law locations. For more information, please give us a call or fill out a short form online to sign up for a free consultation today! Let us make a positive difference in your life.
“Tip #1: Decide – Decide if you are ready to leave the marriage. Decide what you want your new chapter to look like. Decide. Make big-picture decisions. Once you know where you are going (“the finish line” or “end goal”), the path ahead becomes much clearer.Tip #2: Research – Research the process. Know what to expect. Contact a lawyer and get to know them. Divorce is hard, but it will be easier if you understand the process and what to expect. When choosing a lawyer, find someone you trust. You will work closely with them for weeks, months, or even years. Pick the lawyer who knows and understands YOU.”
– Karlee Stoppenhagen, Managing Partner
ADDITIONAL RESOURCES
Where To Start When Considering Divorce
It’s essential for you to be as prepared as possible and to understand your rights before proceeding with a divorce.
Spring Cleaning: Tips For Dividing Household Items During A Divorce
Dividing household items during a divorce can be tedious and emotional. Here are some helpful tips to guide you through the process.
Finding The Right Family Law Firm
Finding a good law firm is just as important as choosing the right attorney. The dynamics of a firm can have a significant impact on your case.
CONTACT US
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